Generational

My family went to eat brunch at our favorite diner around mid-day.  I was reading a library book (no!) and not really paying attention to them, so I came rather late into a conversation in which Lone Star Pa was defending to the incredulous Lone Star Girl his mother's view of the U.S. atomic attack on Hiroshima and Nagasaki as "necessary", using the "she came from a different generation so she thought differently" defense.  This is sort of a polite-to-his-mother way of saying that thousands of innocent Japanese children didn't seem like real people to someone of her upbringing, I suppose.  The Lone Star Girl and I were arguing that the Japanese attack on the U.S. was an attack on a military target and in no way excused the murder of all those Japanese civilians.  It was a lively conversation as ours so generally are.

Only later did I see an elderly man sitting at a near-by table looking at me.  He wasn't glaring or trying to express disapproval or anything but he was clearly unsettled in some way.  I wondered if he was shocked that I and my children so obviously saw the use of the atomic bomb as sinful.  I wondered if he fought in WWII.  

I don't lionize soldiers.  I don't think they deserve special props for their sacrifices because I don't believe that fighting wars really is "serving our country."  I believe they internalize the self-talk of sacrifice, but I don't think that's an excuse - just because your society says it is okay to kill people and that it makes you a hero doesn't make that true.  (And full disclosure - I have two little brothers in the military - I love them very much but don't think they are choosing a heroic path.)  It's always wrong to kill.

I am less patient with "old people " defenses than I used to be.  Less patient with excusing racism and classism because someone grew up with it, when the same people are willing to write off people who don't rise above much more restrictive conditions than their own programming. 

I think everyone deserves compassionate and gentle treatment because we are all deeply flawed.  I don't think that lets any of us off the hook.